What are you looking for when you seek closure? Is it an apology, acknowledgment, or maybe a deeper understanding of the other people involved? What I’ve noticed is that when people talk about wanting closure, they’re almost always framing it as something they get from another person. It’s talking to someone who has done wrong by you or someone you’ve wronged, and chickens, this is a lie we tell ourselves.
We first tell ourselves that we don’t even know what we could possibly think instead of our current thoughts, and then we expect a thought we try on once or twice to do all the work for us. However, it is not the thought’s job to convince us of its validity and believability, and on today’s episode, I’m showing you why it’s crucial for you to sell yourself on your thoughts and how to do so.
We often think we don’t have control over sexual attraction because we assume it’s out of our control. While there is a biological element to attraction, the most important takeaway I want you all to consider from today’s episode is that it’s not all biology and that your thoughts have a huge impact on the sexual dynamic between you and your partner, and your experience of sex overall.
Most of us haven’t done much deep work around our sexuality because we often think there’s a physiological basis to it that precedes our thoughts. I’m here this week to tell you that our thoughts have a huge impact on our experience of sexuality and desire, and today, I’m starting to put the pieces of the puzzle together to help you have a deeper understanding of your own sexual experience.
When we feel defensive, we think that it’s because other people are wrong about us or have made an unfair assessment, but it’s actually the complete opposite. We feel defensive because we fear that what the other person has said or thought – or what we are projecting they think just in our own minds! – is TRUE.
Erika shares her experience of navigating racism and her own journey of finding her voice to speak up and have difficult conversations as a black woman. You’ll hear how learning the coaching tools has impacted her life, and she illustrates the nuances of how she uses thought work to process her experiences, allow her emotions, and take action.